Moving to Disney World is so darn exciting. Cinderella Castle, delicious food, my favorite attractions, the potential to get a tan (not gonna happen), being able to meet Mickey whenever I please.
While I get so excited thinking about living a whole different life in Orlando (at least for six months), I also am so nervous because of the whole concept. It’s new. I’ve never lived in Florida. I still don’t know what my life will look like when my program is done. Will I want to stay? Will I want to come back home and start all over again in another place? Will I miss my momma so much that I just can’t stand it?
When I start panicking about all the “new” coming up, I need to start thinking rationally: I’ve started over before and loved it. Yes, I was homesick, but I was able to combat the homesickness by staying busy and knowing that what I was doing was such a good thing. Things will be more clear when I arrive and start working and living in DISNEY WORLD. Kaila, you’re going to DISNEY WORLD. Let’s focus on that.
As you can see, I’m sort of a mess.
I’m writing this to release some of the nerves I’ve been building up. All these emotions are truly the weirdest thing–I think about Wishes! and Fantasmic and get chills and cry, and then I think about my dogs and my bed and cry some more. I think about hugging Mickey and can’t control my smiling, and then I hug my family and know that I can’t do this every day for awhile.
I’ve been in college for four years, and I’m used to being away from home. Why am I doing this now?
While Disney is my second home, I’ve only ever visited with my family. It’s our special place to make memories and to just let loose. We’ve conquered the “World” together, met all the characters to meet, saw all the nighttime spectaculars to see. Walt Disney World is hard to imagine without the constant companionship of my family. It will be weird. Perhaps it will be hard. I just know I want to experience the college program and learn what the Disney company can offer, so fear has to be an afterthought.
Hundreds of DCP blogs and vlogs exist on the web, but few touch on this awkward, anxious time in between acceptance and check-in. I’m here to be a voice for all my fellow nervous, frightened almost-CPs. It’s possible to be incredibly excited and simultaneously incredibly nervous.
To anyone who is about to start something new and feels a tiny bit of what I’m feeling, I’m here to say that it’s ok. Yes, we are excited. Beyond so. But we are also apprehensive and nervous, worried about the unknown. It’s normal. Or, at least, I hope it’s normal.
I’m trying to ward off these nervous thoughts with thoughts of all the good that is to come–I get to start over in a new place and assert myself in a new way. I literally get to see dreams coming true each and every day. I’ll get to sport one of those name tags I’ve always thought about wearing, but never thought I would have the guts to go off the beaten path to have the opportunity to wear one.
I might be nervous, but I can almost taste the exciting opportunities ahead of me. That anticipation of good things to come trumps the anxiousness, forcing the little purple, gangly “Fear” (Inside Out, anyone?) to take a backseat to the iridescent “Joy.”
I’m here now, even in my anxious state, happy and perfectly content traveling off that beaten path. When people ask me why I’m going to work at Disney with my newly-minted English literature degree, I internally respond, “Why not?” I’m moving to Disney World, everybody. Why not move to the most magical place on earth and make some magic for others? I may not get to experience Disney with my family on a daily basis, but I’ll be able to make a little happiness for other Disney families out there.
So. In review: I’m moving to Disney, I’m nervous as can be, and I’m so excited about it. Just a few more weeks till check-in, and my new journey begins.
Let’s do this.